What I wrote yesterday wasn't much of an entry so HERE I AM! I know, I know, you are just overjoyed!

Let me first say: my goal for this entry is to not talk about boys at all, not once! So lets begin.

I am loving this time of year, winter is just around the corner and I really want it to snow already. For some reason I am really looking forward to winter this year! I have no idea why because usually I loathe winter and everything that comes with it (excluding Christmas, of course). But not this year. The only thing I am not really looking forward to: ice. For two reasons, 1: icy roads + lead foot + taking my dear time to step on break (which I have a bad habit of doing) = not too great. I strongly dislike winter driving. 2. Frozen car doors. UGH! The other morning I had to run out to my car before I went to school to get something for my mom. Welllll I couldn't get my car doors open! It took me forever to get the damn things open. By then I was running more than 10 minutes late. Trust me, there was alot of grumbling and cursing that morning. But I guess that's to be expected in good ol' NoDak.

I'm already thinking of things all my friends can do together, like sledding and ice skating...both of which I haven't done in a long, long, long time. I'm excited!

And then of course, my ultimate favorite day of the year (besides Halloween that is)...CHRISTMAS!!! I love love love Christmas. Not because of presents and all that (although I do like giving and getting gifts), but because of the atmosphere. I don't know, there is just something in the air around Christmas time. I know, that sounds cheesy but it's true! I can't explain it, but I just love it.
          Even though it is only November 6, I have been listening to Christmas music for about 2 weeks now. I really like Christmas music, it just makes me really happy. Lol. And whats better than Christmas music? Only one thing: Josh Groban singing Christmas music. YES, Josh Groban has released a Christmas CD titled "Noel" and I suggest EVERYONE buy it. It is amazing. And I'm not just saying that as a Grobanite but as a person who loves Christmas music. It's perfect in every sense of the word. I'm listening to it right now as a matter of fact!

Moving on, one week ago tomorrow was my 17th birthday. It's weird that October 31 has already come and gone. I wont be 16 years old ever again. It's kind of sad to think about. You only turn 16 once and thats over and done with for me. I feel so old talking about this. But it's wierd...weird...I can't spell. I think it's 'weird' but you'll have to correct me if I'm wrong. And in 358 days, I will be 18. It's wierd...weird to look at it that way, ya know? 358 days...that's it. GAH I'M GETTING OLD! Lol.

I have been thinking alot lately about what I want to do when I grow up. For the longest time I had my heart set on becoming a journalist. But lately I have thinking about maybe becoming a teacher. I don't know, it's just a thought, for all I know, this might change before I'm finished with this entry. But I was thinking about maybe coming like a speech teacher or something. I don't know, I'm just thinking about things. I'm not going to worry about it too much because I still have a while to think about it.

But I think I'm gonna get going, so until next time!

          God Bless and Happy (waaaaayyyyy early) Holidays!
                                        EMILY!

...complaining about a boy, that I cannot get over and yada, yada, yada...whatever, I'm done. I can't do it anymore. I've wasted enough time thinking about it and wondering what maybe could have been and why I don't seem to be good enough anymore. I'm no longer going to let them get to me the way they have been. I'm done, I'm done and I'll say it again: I'M DONE. I have tried and cleary it's not going to do me any good. So, whatever. I have officially moved on, gotten over it, grown up, the whole kit and kaboodle. And it's about damn time. I don't know what is suddenly wrong with me but I don't give a rat's ass anymore, I'm done trying to win someone who is so far out of reach that I'm just kidding myself.

I give up.

I'm done.

 

Bonjour!
For all you non french speaking folk, the title of this entry says "I am sick". I am sick physically and I'm sick of alot of things. I don't know why this always happens to me but I'm really getting sick of it happening all the time. Ok, let me explain. Have you ever struck up a friendship with someone and you think to yourself, "Wow, this person is pretty cool! I think they are a good friend!" And then out of nowhere they just stop talking to you. You have no idea why and you know you didn't do anything wrong but they still just completely stop talking to you. It's almost as if you are unworthy of being spoken to, like this "friend" doesn't even want anything to do with you any longer. And then you start to think to yourself, "well, I must have done something wrong to make them not want to talk to me." So you try to talk to them but all you get is one line...or sometimes even one word answers. And you are still completely in the dark as to why this person wants nothing to do with you. I'm kinda going through that right now. And I'm really starting to get annoyed by this person. Yeah, I hadn't talked to them in a while so I decided to at least make the effort and I tried to strike up a conversation but that got me nowhere. It makes me feel stupid and unworthy and its kind of a blow to the self-esteem! I don't know what I did wrong but if that is the way this person is going to be then fine, I'm not going to sit here and wait for it to be ok for the person to talk to me. I don't know who this person thinks they are but they are really starting to make me mad. And it's just kind of baffling, because this person and I used to talk all the time but just like that the talking stopped. Whatever, I'm done worrying about it. It just makes me feel crappy. Other people have done this and I no longer speak to them at all, I have nothing against them but appearently they did against me.

Anyway, I stayed home sick today. I had a bit of a fever and I couldn't walk straight and I just all around felt like crap. Ugh.

I am officially obcessed with all things Johnny Cash right now. I have watched "Walk the Line" many times within the past week and I made copies of all my mom's Johnny Cash music and I'm doing a speech about him in speech class. Lol. I reeeeally like his music.

But I think thats about all for now!

So this is my 5th day of school and I have only had homework twice. TWICE! How amazing is that?! Most of my friends are already loaded down with homework in every subject where I am the exact opposite! I'm very happy! I am about to say something I don't think I've ever said before in MY LIFE: I'm actually enjoying my math class. The teacher slows down to make sure everyone is together and explains things more and I understand all of it! It makes me happy to think that maybe I will actually pass with a grade I can be proud of and show to my parents.

Ok, here is my question for you: Have you ever been in a mood where you feel as though you are invincible, that nothing can knock your feet out from under you? Well, I was in one of those moods today, I felt that I was on top of it, I was in control of all I needed to be in control of. But, as always, something just had to rain on my parade. I don't know why I let it get to me so much but it's just something that's been a huge part of my life for a while now and it's hard to let go of and forget. I know that I need to forget about it for it's only going to hurt me in the long run but it's not easy just to forget about something that made such an impact in my life. I don't know, you are probably wondering what it is that I can't stop dwelling over but I'm not going to say, this is just something that I needed to get off my chest and I didn't know how to tell someone so I figured the best way to deal with it was to write it all out. So there you go.

This year is going to be a good year, I can feel it. I'm excited for numerous things: Prom (of course durr), snow (thats a first as well), football/hockey games, dances, pep rallies (I'm a geek, I know) and lots of other things.

But I think that is about it for now, so I will talk to you later!

                          Thanks for reading! EMILY!

I started my junior year today. And the only word to describe it would be: BORING...I take that back, there are two words to describe today, BORING and LOOOOOONG! Ugh. By 7th hour I was so ready to go home. I was surprised though that we didn't read through the rule book in the planner like we do every year. Thank goodness. It still seems wierd that I am a junior. It makes me sound older and more sophisticated. Lol. I don't know why, but it does.

This is my schedule:
1: Journalism I
2: Orchestra
3: French II
4: Speech and Communications
      --Lunch--
5: Choir III
6: Mathematical Modeling
7: English III

My classes seem like they will be pretty cool once we get out of talking about the rules and expectations and all that jazz. In Journalism I this morning the teacher told us about what we are going to be doing in that class and that we are going to learn how to write not like you would talk but actual writing...I don't remember how he put it but when we said it I was like, "YES! I need to learn how to do that!" I write like I am talking and I really don't like that I do that. We will also be putting the yearbook together and the newspapers of course. It will be fun, I am excited.

Orchestra is...orchestra. Nothing new, same people (unfortunatley). You know, I like playing the violin and I like being in orchestra but it's just some of the people in that class who just drive me up the wall. They just rub me the wrong way and I just sometimes want to smack them. But other than some of the people, it's not too bad.

French is...alésage. That's boring in Francais! Lol. My teacher is on maternity leave so we have a sub for a few months and she's...interesting, to say the least.

Speech, haha, my teacher is perfect for her job. basically all we are going to learn in that class is how to talk to people and in front of crowds. Well today we had to introduce ourselves and she went first....she took the whole hour talking about herself. I thought it was kinda funny.

CHOIR! Is my favorite class. I love choir. There are 66 people in the Centralian Choir, 48 girls and 18 boys. Lol. Kristen is in choir too! We are kinda loud and we realized today that we won't be sitting by each other for very much longer. Which is nothing unusual, we are usually always split up. Lol.

Mathematical Modeling, or as I like to call it, Retard Math! It seems like it will be easy. I hope it is. The teacher said that we will be doing mostly hands-on things, like labs and whatnot. Thats totally fine with me, I think I learn better visually rather than verbally. I think I said that correctly. But I just want to pass it.

English...well....hmmm...it's English. I don't like some of the people in that class but there is not much I can do about it. It's the last class of the day and of course it seems to take the longest.

And that's my day for you! Lol. I would like to talk more but I've got to get going, so I will finish tomorrow!

EMILY!

Hello again!
Today is Tuesday, August 21, 2007
And it is 12:12 in the afternoon.

The weather is slowly starting to get better although it certainly isn’t sunny and 80 degrees but hey, it’s not raining and there is no wind! So I’m not complaining.

We went to Duluth yesterday. It was actually pretty cool! I liked it. When we first got there we went and stood by the HUGE harbor. There was a ship coming in and it was the biggest ship I had ever seen….well…actually it’s was the only ship I had ever seen. It was from Japan. It was pretty cool. I’m not going to lie. Then we went to some museum that had a lot of stuff about the ships and whatnot. It wasn’t what I thought it was going to be so I was kind of disappointed.

After the museum we went on a boat tour of the Lake Superior harbor and that was very cool. Although it was down right freezing. I took about 80 pictures of the harbor. I know, I’m cool. But I learned a lot from it. Like, there are over 350 ship wrecks in Lake Superior (the ship in the title being one of them) and that the lake is averaged at a depth of about 400 feet and deeper in some spots. The biggest wave they have on record was 42’. Yikes!

And I can’t go anywhere without going to a gift shop, so we found one. I found this cool bracelet that is kind of rope-like and the tag had a story on it and it said that in the old days sailors used to make these bracelets out of the rope from their ships and use them to either wipe the sweat from their foreheads (eww) or they would give them to their sweethearts. I thought that was very cool so I bought one! Lol. The tag also said that once you get it wet it shrinks to fit your wrist perfectly (there’s no taking it off unless you cut it) so today when we went for a boat ride I dipped my hand in the water getting the bracelet wet and now it fits just right.

I also learned about this mansion called “The Glensheen Mansion” where a rich New Yorker and his family lived in the 1880’s. They built the mansion and it took them 3 years and it was worth about 800,000$ then. And it’s right on the harbor so it is really a beautiful place. I also learned that a relative of the Congdons (the family that lived there) was murdered in that house back in the 1970’s. I think she was poisoned or something. You can take tours through the house and I really wanted to but they were closed. I thought that was creepy, we drove by the mansion and it is huge but it’s really creepy because it’s kind of tucked away in the trees and there is a creepy gate at the end of the driveway. Kinda sends a chill up your spine.

I really liked it there, it was a cool city. We went to a beach later so we could kinda walk in the water and the water was very cold! And then I realized there were people SURFING (it was windy so there were 4’ waves) in the lake. They must have had a screw loose or something.  But I still can’t get over how big that lake is! The harbor alone is bigger than the lake we are staying at. I would really like to go back there someday.



But I think that is about it for now, I will be back with more later!
                   EMILY!

I don’t really know when this will be posted so bare with me.

The owners of the resort have anywhere between 3 and 5 dogs… I swear I see a new one every time I walk through here. But today when I was in the lodge there was this brown and white dog and she is incredibly over weight and the woman behind the counter said that she is that way because she goes from cabin to cabin begging for food and people always feed her. We got kind of a chuckle from that. And then later this evening when my grandparents were here I was looking out the window there was a brown face peering in through the dinning room window. It was the obese dog. We opened the door and she invited herself in. We gave her two hotdogs and kind of shoo-ed her out the door. Well she didn’t go far, she went back to the window and sat there. Within 5 minutes she was inside again and we gave her more food. She stayed inside for a minute or two and kind of followed us around…especially when we opened the fridge.

Today’s weather was depressing. It nice and sunny and beautiful when I woke up this morning but then it clouded up and the wind came back and the temperature went down and now it’s miserable. So as I write this I am also watching Pirates of the Caribbean 2 since there isn’t much you can do in weather like this. I love those movies… and Johnny Depp.

My parents are contemplating whether or not we should go to Duluth tomorrow. I want to but watch, the one day we are not at the campsite the weather will be beautiful! That would be our luck.  I think we would do things like go to the zoo (I like zoos), a ferry ride thing or whatever, and then my favorite…SHOPPING!!! YAY!!  Which reminds me…I have a coupon for American Eagle that I need to use soon…

I have this song in my head and I cannot get it out! It’s “Sparks” by Coldplay. A friend of mine put a link (or whatever it’s called) in a message he sent me on Facebook and I really liked it. I just thought you would like to know that little tidbit. You’re welcome.

Have you ever seen the movie “I Am Sam”? If not, I suggest you watch it. It’s a very good movie and the music in it is also very good. Especially “Two of Us” by Aimee Mann and some Michael person whose last name I can’t remember right now. Oops. But it is a very good song and I like it very much.

 I was also introduced to a new musical this summer called “Jekyll & Hyde”. I don’t like all of the songs from the show but there were two I really liked. “Someone Like You” and “This Is The Moment”. I have them on my iPod and I listen to them continuously.

I was thinking about something yesterday and I realized that this little vacation to the lake couldn’t have come at a better time. At home I was thinking way too much and about things that I shouldn’t be thinking about so much. So I needed something new to take my mind off of some things that are going…or not going on in my life right now. And about two weeks ago I was absolutely dreading going back to school because I did not want this summer to end. But I came to realize that I need to go back to school. All I do at home is sit around and eat. I need to go back to all of the stairs that I hate so much during the year and I need to have a routine again. I need something to do. And I miss all of my friends. I am looking forward to all of the extra curricular activities this year. Like football games and dances…I get to go to Prom this year! YAY!...now all I’ll need is a date!   And maybe I am a really big dork but I like the pep rallies! Abby and I only like them because of the Drum Line. That’s our favorite part.

I really hope this school year goes a lot better than last year’s did. My grades sucked and it was incredibly stressful. And it was my own fault. But not this year, nooooo, this year will be better. I promise.  Something tells me this will be a good year. I just have a feeling that it will be a lot of fun. I still can’t believe it’s already my junior year. Holy moley. One more year and I will be a senior. GAH! This is all going by so fast. Colleges are already sending me things and it’s like “Whoa! I’m not even a junior yet!” The other night I was on the computer so I started looking at colleges online out of pure boredom  and I found 5 that I liked and because I know you are just dying to know what they are, I will tell you! Ok…
1. University of North Dakota (My parent’s favorite…go figure)
2. North Dakota State University
3. Concordia College…I’m not sure about this one, but it has a journalism/communications dept. so it’s an option)
4. Bemidji State University
5. University of Minnesota in the Twin Cities.
And there you have it. I will more than likely end up going to UND but you never know, I’m just keeping my options open. They all seem to have a good Journalism/ Communications department so  I like them all.

But I think that is about all for now.  So I will talk more….some other time!


                                 Ok, BYE! Emily.

Good afternoon!!!
Today is our first full day at Lake Andrusia…no, it’s not really Lake Amnesia.
After spending about 2.5 hours in the car yesterday I was glad to finally get here. But later, the excitement started to fade and disgust moved in. When you look at this cabin on the internet the description says “newly remodeled”…well, I beg to differ. The couch/pullout bed (which is my bed) sags and the TV. is probably worth about 5$. The microwave does not work; the silverware is disgusting…we cleaned them about three times. Oh, and the lock on our front door doesn’t work so whenever we leave to go somewhere we either hide the laptop or bring it with us. But the owner is coming today to fix it. Sometime this week we are going to Walker to do some shopping and I think we are going to look for some other resorts because I have a big feeling that we will not be staying here again.

We went to Marclay Point last night to have to fire with my grandparents and my uncle. It was coooooolld! And windy! Burrr. But after a while it died down and the fire felt good. My uncle’s dog Lilly was there too and she is a spaz so I took her for numerous walks. We used to camp at Marclay Point in our pop-up camper but eventually the owners took out all public bathrooms and showers so we couldn’t stay there anymore. The owners are definitely not very social.

There are a couple good things about this cabin however, there are two huge bay windows and our cabin faces the water so all we see is the lake, it’s really pretty. I will have to post a picture on here in a bit. And we are about 50 feet from the water. So if you look past all the cons, there are a couple pros.

We are putting the boat in the water today. I am somewhat looking forward to going fishing. Haha, not that I will catch anything but it will be fun. I like fishing, but I DO NOT put the worm/minnow/leach on my hook nor do I take it off. I do not take the fish off the hook either. I’m kind of a sissy but whatever.

There is a pool here for all the anti-lake water folk. PANZIES!!! And there is a hot tub but you have to an “adult” to be able to go in it. Shucks. I walked on the beach yesterday and the sand is so soft! Oh my goodness, it felt really good. The water was freezing but the sand felt good.

This morning at about 4:30 I woke up and went to the bathroom and when I was finished I closed the bathroom door so the sound of the running toilet wouldn’t wake anyone. I went back to my saggy bed and all of a sudden I hear this slow and incredibly creepy creaking. I realized the bathroom door was making the noise and it scared the crap out of me. I told my parents about it this morning and they laughed at me, but it was really freaky.

But I think that is about it for now, I will be back probably tomorrow with more happenings at Lake Andrusia.

                              

EMILY!

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellllo!
It is Friday, August 10th and it is 10:59 am.
The weather is cloudy and depressing...it had better not rain.
I don't really know what to talk about so bare with me, this may get a wee bit boring.

Now it is 11:00 am.

This week has been...different. Lol, I can't think of any other way to put it. I don't really know how to explain it without going into grave detail so I will just leave it at this: Everything is starting to look up and I feel better.

This coming week is my last week of summer...at home anyways, the week after that I will be at the lake all week. It should be fun but a whole week at the lake....with my family. I don't know how that is going to go. But at least we are not staying in a tent-in-a-box a.k.a The Pop-Up Camper. 5 people and two dogs in a 12' x 6' or 7' space is not a very good mix. We rented a cabin for the week so it should be alright. I haven't been to the lake in a long time. And it'd better not rain. I hate rain and it always seems to rain when we go to the lake.

So I have some very important and EXCITING news, do you think you can handle it? Do ya? Ok here it is....this coming Monday I am...GETTING MY HAIR CUT AND COLORED!!!! Haha, isn't that just too exciting?! I bet you are just flabbergasted! But holy cow do I need it. My hair is beginning to look rather gross if you ask me. So I am actually looking forward to it. Lol.

See, I told you this may get a little boring. But I am not done.

It is now 11:18 am. I am really slow.

On Tuesday night, The Kristi(e)ns, Sarah, Britt and I all camped out in Britt's backyard and I can honestly say that was the most fun I've had in a long time. At first it was just Sarah, Britt and me and we had the task of setting up the tent. Britt knew what she was doing but Sarah and I had no clue. We could hardly keep the pole thingys (that hold the tent up) together. But we got it...well, Britt got it, but I did put the stakes in the ground, so I did do something productive.
               The Kristi(e)ns arrived after a while. We stayed up all night and we talked about the strangest things. But it was alot of fun. We finally fell asleep at 7 the next morning. I left at about 9:30, went home and slept for 3 hours. Then Britt told me that they were going to Target to get "Tamagotchis", some little electronic toy. I use to have a bunch of them when I was younger. I went with but I didn't get one, I didn't have enough money with me. Bummer. But it was fun.
               I found out some very surprising news...that the boy I have liked all summer...liked me too. But he's not sure if he does now...it's kind of confusing. But it's wierd to think about, the whole time I liked him, he liked me. Lol, Britt and Sarah and I all had this little game like thing going to see who could get the farthest with their 'crush' and they both lost and I guess you could say I won? I don't know but they both say I did. We will just have to see where this goes.

It's 11:32 am. I know, thats a long time....but I went to the bathroom.

And I think thats about all I can think of right now.  It took me half an hour just to write this. Wow, I'm kind of lame. Lol. I HAVE ANOTHER PICTURE!!!! Ok, here it is....

From left to right that is Kristin, Ally, Sarah, me, Kristen, Hannah, and Britt. I could have out a nice picture of all of us on here but I'm afraid this is as nice as it gets. Haha.

Again....COMMENTS....I LOVE THEM!

                                                   Thanks for reading,
                                                                       Emily.

So I had a different blog thing for a couple of years and I was getting sick of that one and I don't know I just decided to get rid of it. But then I started thinking about all the crap that I had written and realized that I like to write in one of these. Not that any of it will make much sense to anyone who reads it but I don't really much care, no one is making you read this, leave if you want, I don't care. But if you want to stay and keep reading, fantastic. And I really like comments...just putting that out there. But not mean ones...those I don't really fancy.

I had about 50 to 60 entries in my last blog/webjournal/e-journal...whatever you want to call it and I always liked to go back and read everything and then laugh at myself and wonder...."What in the hell was I thinking about this person..." and "What on earth was I talking about?!" and I would read all the comments I would get from people saying how much they liked reading my blog...webjournal.....e-journal....WHATEVER....I'm going to call it a blog.....anyway...and that kinda made me think, "Hey, I must be pretty good if people I don't even know like my writing..." buuuuut something always seems to rain on my parade...it's inevitable (I don't know if that's spelled right and I don't feel like going to dictionary.com right now), I read other people's BLOGS and these people are amazing writers, they have no intentions of ever becoming a journalist, whereas I, on the other hand, want to become a journalist but I can hardly spell 'inevitable'. Does that make sense? I just feel that I don't have what it takes to become what a journalist. And maybe within a couple of years, that wont be a problem. I signed up for a journalism class at school this coming year so hopefully that may clear up a few problems. I have been thinking alot about my future lately and where I want to be in 10 years, and alot of things have crossed my mind like: What college do I want to go to...or will I even get into college (my grades aren't...the best...I put leave it at that.)? Do I want to stay in GF or move (that one is easy....move!)? I don't know, I've just been thinking alot lately and I think about one thing which leads into something else and I start worrying about something and then ARGH! Too much to deal with right now.

And then my parents...ugh, I don't know if I even want to go there. You want to know the one word that I have heard at least once everyday since school ended...."JOB" and then I hear..."YOU NEED ONE!" I know I do...buuuut I don't really want one. Haha. I'm kind of lazy but then again I don't know of a 16-year-old who isn't. I had a job but it sucked, my boss was a perv and I was hardly getting paid (One paycheck was for 11$....11 freaking dollars!!!). So that didn't last too long. It was just a disgusting place too...*shudders* I don't even want to think about it.

SO MOVING ON....I don't know how personal I will be getting in this BLOG because in my last one I got a little too personal and some people found out things that I didn't necessarily want them to know. So we'll have to see.

For some odd reason ot another I feel like posting a picture in here. So...I think I will!

Those retards would be my best friends Kristen, Kristin and me.
I don't know why, but I felt it was necessary to put that on here....
So deal with it!
 

But I think that is about all I feel like saying right now.
Again....I love comments!

EMILY!